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WISDOM FOR GETTING A MARRIAGE PARTNER

Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD.” It is one of the profound statements in the Bible. It talks about a process and an end. FINDING is a process, the result is a GOOD THING engineered by God’s favour. Pa Elton, one of the missionaries who raised many of the present generation of Christian leaders in Nigeria was known to have said, God has left the business of supplying wives to people since the day Adam blamed him for giving him a wife. (Remember Adam told God when he queried him about the forbidden fruit, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.” In other words, I am not responsible for this; God you are responsible). Since that time it has become HE WHO FINDS! Its looks funny but a good sense of reality is what you find there. Finding a marriage partner is actually a JOINT VENTURE between God and man. God has a will. Yet it is your duty to discern it, discover it and be responsible for it. He wont impose anyone on you. You are to PROVE what is that “good and acceptable and perfect will of God” (Rom 12:2). What process is involved in this FINDING?
First is YOUR PREPARATION. When you are going on a journey to search and FIND, you prepare. A lot of people tell you to pray for them in getting a marriage partner and you ask, is this man or woman really prepared? Marriage is not for boys, it is for men. Preparation may be physical, spiritual, financial and everyone knows, you are just ready. When you see a lady seeking for someone to marry and she dresses like a 40 or 50 years old mama or grandma, you wonder how prepared she is. At the other extreme when you see a lady looking for a correct man to marry and she dresses like a harlot, I don’t need to tell you the kind of men that will approach her for marriage. The second is YOUR TARGET. You want to FIND a “good thing, “what is your definition of a good wife or husband? Is it someone younger or older than you? Someone educated or illiterate, taller or shorter, dark or fair, good cook or bad cook, sanguine, melancholic, phlegmatic or choleric? Is his or her blood group compatible with yours or you don’t mind raising 3 or 4 Sickle Cell children in your marriage? Are you trying to get a baby Christian who you will be waking up every morning and begging to pray and go to Church or a mature (and maturing) Christian whom you can love and serve God together? You must settle the issue of COMPATIBILITY. The third is YOUR JOURNEY in FINDING. Do you walk it in the flesh or Spirit? Definitely, you need God. You must be prayerful and must know how God speaks to you. The time of marriage is not the time you try to know how God speaks. You should have perfected that before the issue of marriage comes in. You don’t need any prophet because no one will be with you when marriage challenges come. You will only survive on your CONVICTION. Also, marriage prayer is the only prayer you pray with your “eyes opened” (maybe apart from demon-casting prayers). So “shine your eyes!” He or she could be in your church or fellowship, the next trip, the next street, one of your friends on Facebook, or the person with you when reading this post, or ANYWHERE. But one of the people God may want to give you may be one of your FRIENDS. Relationship is very vital before marriage choice comes in. You couldn’t have driven everyone away with your character and expect them back when it is time for marriage. Finally, is YOUR LOCATION. By this I mean locating what you have been trying to FIND. When you see him or her something is likely to ring in you and say “THIS IS IT!” Don’t waste time please. Once you confirm in your spirit and you have the peace of God, walk up to her, and say I LOVE YOU and I WANT TO MARRY YOU. Don’t carry a big Bible and start preaching or speaking in tongues. She will drive you out! I am waiting for you IV!

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